The Eternal Stages of Falling in Love

Love is addictive. The butterflies in your stomach, the exhilarating emotions, and the feeling of floating on top of the world… Did you know that research has identified three distinct stages of love? These stages are not only unique but also tied to specific hormones.

Let’s Begin with the Origin

Passionate love develops through feelings that lead to sexual attraction, physical interest, and romance. “When we see someone we like, something captivates us and draws us to them,” researchers suggest. “Attraction is physical, often inspired by hair, eyes, and body appeal.”

The deepening process of falling in love can generally be broken down into four stages:

  1. Stage One: The Euphoric Phase – Lasting from 6 to 24 months (2 years)
  2. Stage Two: The Early Attachment Phase – Spanning 12 months (1 year) to 60 months (5 years)
  3. Stage Three: The Crisis Phase – Occurring between 60 months (5 years) and 84 months (7 years)
  4. Stage Four: The Deep Attachment Phase – Beginning at 84 months (7 years) and continuing indefinitely

From a hormonal perspective, the process of falling in love can also be categorized into distinct phases:


The Process of Falling in Love: Stage 1 – Lust

The wild phase of desire, fueled by the sex hormones testosterone and estrogen. Testosterone drives libido, attraction, and mating instincts in both men and women. During this phase, individuals subconsciously highlight their testosterone and estrogen levels to showcase fertility and attract potential partners.


The Process of Falling in Love: Stage 2 – Attraction

In the attraction phase, couples are head-over-heels in love, often overwhelmed by their emotions. At this stage, people can’t seem to focus on anything else—they even forget to eat and sleep. Key neurotransmitters come into play during this phase:

  • Dopamine – Released in the brain’s reward center, it gives us the feeling of winning a prize when we’re with our loved one.
  • Norepinephrine – Also known as adrenaline, it heightens our sensations of love, quickens our heartbeat, causes us to blush, and makes us sweat in the presence of our new flame.

The Process of Falling in Love: Stage 3 – Attachment

After the wild emotions of lust and the excitement of attraction comes attachment. This phase helps couples strengthen their bonds and grow feelings of connectedness. During this stage, individuals decide to rely on their partners. Two key hormones come into play here:

  • Oxytocin – Often called the “cuddle hormone,” it is released during touch, eye contact, and moments that foster connection.
  • Vasopressin – This small yet potent chemical fosters feelings of long-term commitment and helps prevent infidelity.

Falling in love is as much a chemical journey as it is an emotional one. Each phase builds upon the other, paving the way for deep connection and lasting relationships.

Source: The 3 Stages of Love | Science of People

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