What should I do If I have a broken heart?

Millions may have already asked the question: What should I do if I have a broken heart? Three key steps can lead to healing, which we are now going to show you. With the help of an expert reviewer, you can confidently rely on these steps in your recovery journey.

Rejection—whether due to a breakup or unrequited feelings—can hurt just as much as a physical injury. The healing process may take some time, but it’s a journey you must undertake.

What Should I Do If I Have a Broken Heart?

Step 1: Give Yourself Space!

Let’s break down the first big step into smaller, actionable steps. By focusing on smaller goals, you can achieve success sooner, making it easier to progress toward full recovery.

Allow Yourself to Grieve: Heartbreak is painful. You can’t bypass the fact that it hurts. Give yourself time to experience and process these emotions. Your brain is signaling that you’ve been hurt, so don’t try to suppress these feelings.
Focus on One Day at a Time: Trying to handle all your emotions and the consequences of heartbreak at once is overwhelming. Instead, take things moment by moment and stay present.
Accept the Emptiness: When a relationship ends or you’re rejected, you may feel like there’s a huge void inside you, like a black hole sucking away all the happiness in your life. Many people make the mistake of trying to fill this void immediately because they can’t bear the feeling. Yes, it will hurt, and you’ll feel empty for a while, but that’s part of the process.
Talk About It: A strong support system of friends, family, or even a therapist can help you bounce back faster than anything else. They won’t fill the void left by the person you loved, but they will make it easier to cope with the emptiness.
Get Rid of Keepsakes: Holding onto mementos will only slow down the healing process.
Help Someone in Need: Assisting someone, especially someone going through similar pain, can help you momentarily forget your struggles. This gives you a break from grief and self-pity.
Allow Yourself to Fantasize: You’ll probably imagine your love coming back, telling you how foolish they were to let you go. It’s normal to fantasize about kissing them and being close again. Let yourself indulge in these thoughts—they are part of the process.

What Should I Do If I Have a Broken Heart?

Step 2: Start the Healing Process

The next significant step in overcoming heartbreak is to dive into the healing process, which might begin more calmly now that you’ve allowed yourself to fully experience the pain.

Avoid Triggers: Triggers can be anything—a song that played when your relationship started, the café you frequented, or even a scent that reminds you of them. These memories may surface often. Acknowledge the triggers and the memories they bring, then move on. Don’t dwell on the emotions. For instance, if you see a photo of the two of you on Facebook, recognize the sadness it stirs but shift your focus to something positive or neutral (like planning tomorrow’s outfit or playing with a new pet).
Don’t Over-Avoid Triggers: Avoiding all triggers is impossible. Instead, minimize exposure to things that cause you pain or remind you of the past to facilitate your healing process.
Listen to Music: Play upbeat, lively songs, and dance, sing, and shake off the blues. Science shows that music can release endorphins, which boost your mood and combat stress.
Stay Busy: After processing your emotions, distract yourself with hobbies, baking, or solving puzzles. When memories of your ex resurface, redirect your focus to another thought or activity.
Change Your Routines: Processing heartbreak includes changing old habits. By introducing new activities, you pave the way for new routines in a life that no longer includes the person who broke your heart.
Don’t Sabotage Your Recovery: Relapses can happen on the road to recovery, and that’s okay—it’s part of the process. Avoid using words like “awful” or “nightmare” to describe your experience. Stick to neutral or positive thoughts. For example, instead of saying, “This breakup is awful,” try, “This breakup is tough, but I’m doing my best to work through it.”
Avoid Embarrassing Situations: Don’t drive past your ex’s house every night to see if they’re dating someone, don’t call them, and don’t text them. Remember that situations change, and so do people. The feelings you have now won’t be the same a week, a month, or a year from now. Eventually, you’ll look back on this time without physical pain.
Focus on Yourself: Use heartbreak as an opportunity to learn something new, do things that make you happier, and spend time with family and friends. This helps you truly focus on recovery and growth.

What Should I Do If I Have a Broken Heart?

Step 3: Achieve Full Acceptance

The final phase is reaching a state of acceptance. This step won’t be a smooth process, but once you get there, nothing will stand in the way of your healing.

Embrace Your Feelings: Allow yourself to feel whatever you need to. No matter how strong you are, everyone is human. It’s okay to cry. Tears are not a sign of weakness.
Forgive: Whether or not someone wronged you, forgive them. Forgive yourself, too. Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting or accepting mistreatment. Instead, it means letting go of thoughts that occupy your mind and block your path to peace.
Don’t Blame Anyone: Accepting heartbreak means realizing that blaming yourself or the other person is counterproductive. What’s done is done, and there’s nothing you can say or do now to change it. Instead, try to feel compassion for them. Whatever they did or didn’t do, acknowledge their struggles. This doesn’t mean forgiving everything, but it does mean letting go of your anger.
Don’t Blame Yourself: Accept and address the things you may have done in the relationship that caused problems. Promise yourself that you’ll make changes in the future. But don’t dwell on what went wrong.
Recognize When You’re Ready to Move On: Everyone heals at their own pace. There’s no set timeline for recovering from heartbreak, but there are signs that you’re moving forward:
- You no longer think it’s your ex calling when an unknown number rings.
- You stop fantasizing about them coming back and begging for your forgiveness.
- You no longer resonate with heartbreak songs and movies as much.
- You start enjoying books and music unrelated to relationships.
Discover Who You Are
One of the outcomes of relationship grief is the chance to rediscover yourself. For a long time, your identity may have revolved around being part of a partnership. Then it shifted to being someone mourning the end of that relationship. Focus on your internal and external growth. Cultivate what makes you unique. Try new, positive experiences.
Avoid Relapses
Just as you don’t want to sabotage your healing, you also want to steer clear of actions that could pull you back into heartache. While some setbacks are unavoidable, you can reduce the risk. Avoid letting that person back into your life too soon—if at all. Doing so could lead to more unhappiness and heartbreak. Sometimes, staying friends with an ex simply isn’t feasible.

If you do experience a relapse, don’t panic. The progress you’ve made so far isn’t lost. It will pay off. Don’t give up. Everyone has to navigate setbacks in the healing process.
Don’t Lose Hope
It’s essential to remember that healing from heartbreak is a journey. It won’t happen overnight. There will be setbacks, obstacles, and a range of unpleasant emotions to navigate. After all, you gave away a piece of your heart. The pain is proof that you are human, crafted with empathy and imperfections, just like the rest of us.